Nil Desperandum

things are looking up, finally. there are only 18 days of school left, and my emotions are everywhere. just like leaving for college for the first time last summer, i will yet again be leaving my "home." although i always knew this home was temporary, it will forever remain a place where i created so many memories, and lived life. the hardest thing in life is leaving people you love. i've done it before, and unfortunately, will be doing it again. yes, my friends at the university of new haven will always be in my heart. distance should never change a friendship. with some of my friends i know that will hold true, others i'm not so sure. part of me will always be with you guys, and i hope you'll always think of me. i don't want anyone to be upset that i won't be coming back, yes i know we'll cry, but crying comes from love. they have to be happy tears because i'm doing whats right for me, and going to have a great life, as will all of you. i hate when everyone says they miss me. too many times a day i have to hear, and it's been going on for the last few years. since the first time i had to live with my aunt for the summer, all i heard was "i miss you come visit." yes, i know everyone misses me, or will miss me, but you're just missing me, i have to deal with missing ALL of you. my life, the routine, the normalcy of my everyday being, will be nonexsistent yet again, and i'll have to start over. i've made some of the best friends i've ever had here. i have two friends specifically that i can tell absolutely everything to and trust them with all of my heart. i have many of those friends at home that i am still close with, if not closer with, but i wish i could be with all of you all of the time. i know that i can keep a friendship through distance, and i hope that my real friends from college will prove to me that they can do the same. i can't wait to visit everyone over the summer ! but, i'm also looking forward to visiting next semester! ~


moving on...

my new start. i can't wait, although i hate leaving behind what i've come to know and love, i'm always excited to begin what life has in store. let's see, summer at the shore. it's what i live for. i've done it all my life! can't wait to have my own room, my own space, my own stuff. it's just what i need. i'm keeping my fingers crossed! i've got a job interview, and it's exactly what i'm looking for. front desk receptionist at a hotel, perrrffeeect. i love life on the go, i love atlantic city, and i love organization, what kind of job could be better for a college student on the run? i can't believe, i don't live with my mom anymore. great feeling, but so weird. i love living with my aunt though. as long as i do what i'm supposed to, nothing can go wrong. i love it. i'm going to have a daily routine, and whenever i can getaways to visit my friends all over the east coast. sweet.

one thing i'm very excited for...
beiing able to cook for myself again. be healthy.and get to the gym everyday. early morning bike rides on the beach every morning at 6am--when its just starting to warm up, and you're in the wonderful fog. laying on the beach all day in the hot sun and not having a care in the world. working. i can't wait to be at a new school on the right track for what i love and have always wanted to do. i just can't wait to do be back to everything that makes me, me. life's looking up.